Day 12: Proud Moments

July 12: Moment you are most proud of

This one is very hard. When I read it a million different moments with Michael ran through my head. Watching a child grow and do "first" things is such an amazing privilege and so many moments he has had have made me incredibly proud.

If I concentrate more on myself I think the first thing that comes to mind is my education. I am very proud of all of my degrees and of keeping good grades and learning new things. When I was in school I participated in (because I had to for class) a research symposium. I spoke about ministry to girls and the need we have for it. Nearly everyone on campus got mad at me for that presentation. I won though! The judge in my room told me he didn't like what I said at all, but that I had done the best job of researching and supporting my cause. I am  proud of that to this day. I am proud of what I said, and that I had the courage to say it. I still believe it to be very true.

 I began reading and my journey toward nerdom very  young...

 Very close, or possibly even more than that, I am proud of ministries I have been involved with. Helping people, in any form, to me is the basic mandate of a good life. I am proud of every attempt I have made in that direction.

I am proud of every time I have ever performed anything. I love preforming, but it also terrifies me. Every time I have sung a solo at church, been in a play, auditioned for a play, sang in a choir etc. are all times I am proud of.
 
Some days I am just proud that I don't give up. I don't let pain or sickness, or anything else for that matter, defeat me. Some days it seems like I have I know, but I always get back up and keep on living. Keep on doing my best for myself and for others. That is probably, in truth, the thing that makes me the most proud - and sometimes the thing that is the hardest to continue!

I Did It

Next topic...What are your 5 greatest accomplishments

Hmmm...I have to say this one is hard. I have made several accomplishments, but I am not sure what makes any one of them greater than another. I think every day is an accomplishment these days! Haha. I guess I will try to think of the things of which I am most proud...

Buying a home this year - it is old and in need of lots of work, but it is mine. Well not really. Not yet. Technically it will be the banks for 30 years, but the idea is that eventually it will be mine. I was not sure I ever wanted to buy a house. I like being about to move around. I have never stayed in one location for very long. I always felt that owning a home would give me a panic attack because I would feel so stuck. Maybe that feeling will eventually hit me, but almost a year later, I still love it. I have a huge hole in my kitchen ceiling right now...but I am still proud of it. I am more broke than ever and I worry sometimes how I will be able to pay my bills, but it still feels right. The house is just my personality, just the right size...it just fits me. I feel like it is maybe the most "grown up" thing I have ever done. It is fun! :)

My education - I am proud of how much I learn to love. No one accomplishment in particular, but just more of my schooling in general. I graduated in the top 20 at my high school, Cum Lade at college, and now I have 2 masters degrees. I began a PhD program at one point but was unable to continue it. I love learning. I love stretching my mind and asking questions. I feel that every piece of knowledge I have gained (whether I use it in every day life or not) is an accomplishment.

My personality - okay I know that one sounds weird, but I mean it! As a child I was so quiet and shy. I never spoke up or had much to say about anything. Oh there are people who wish that had stayed the same! I am very proud that I learned to step out of my introverted comfort zone and become a social person. I make friends easily and ALWAYS have something to say...pretty much about everything! I think the big accomplishment there was realizing that what I had to say was worth being heard, that my contributions to the world were worth making. I am still an introvert, but a very loud and social one! :)

My job - this one is sometimes a double edged sword for me. For so long I felt incredibly guilty for not being in ministry. I got the degrees, I had the training and...I didn't do it. I felt like so many people had supported me and encouraged me and I had let them all down. I lucked into my job at the library. I had worked as a student library assistant and they were gracious enough to give me a full time position when I desperately needed a job. I had no intention of staying there. And then finally one day I realized...I loved it. I was happier with what I was doing at the library than I ever had been attempting to do ministry. Maybe that is selfish. I still have doubts and feelings of guilt about that occasionally. Overall, though, I feel like I have achieved something incredible...I have a job I love. I get to be on a college campus (I am a huge nerd...need the atmosphere!). I get to work with student workers (so not very different from youth ministry I assure you). I get to indulge in my passion for literature and especially YA literature. I get to help people. I get to teach. There are more things I could list but...these are things that I love. I get to go and do them every day. I consider that something to be proud of.

My friends - I may have no right to feel pride over how cool my friends are but...I do! I am a very passionate person. I love people quickly and fully and sometimes very naively. I just trust that friendship is true and that people have my best interests at heart, as I try to have theirs. Obviously, that is not always true. I have been hurt and used and stepped on. I feel pride in the fact that, I have learned the difference. That still happens to me, because I still put myself out there. I still trust and hope and sometimes get burned. I have learned the joy and necessity, though, of true friendships. I have a group of people that surround me that I do not have worry about trusting. I know they are real friends and real support and give me real love. Some never learn this and constantly live with the drama and heartbreak of fair-weathered friends. I feel proud that I have a group I can consistently turn to.


Okay...that is 5. I don't know that it is particularly the TOP 5 accomplishments in my life, but it is 5.