November was insane for me. I started packing my stuff up. Not much to be honest but it was a big deal. I packed up all of Michael's things and that was really emotional and hard for me. It was kind of a finishing out of a chapter of my life that was so important and special to me. And it brought up a lot of amazing memories, but also a lot of hurtful ones. It took a lot out of me. I also took (am still taking actually through this week) a class at work on online teaching. I didn't have to take the class and I guess it was maybe a little weird for me to take it since I don't actually teach anything at this point, but it was something I really wanted to do. Teaching has always been an interest/passion of mine so a chance to get some training for potential use later just seemed like the right thing to do. It has not been a hard class per se BUT it has been challenging in some ways because I am not a teacher. Often the assignments tell us to take a lesson we have taught in the past or an activity we have done before....well that meant I had to start from scratch for those things! My co-workers helped me a lot though, and I have learned so much! I am very glad I made the choice to take it. Homework for that has taken much of my extra time in November, though. I have had 3 photo shoots (yes I am still working on the editing of some of them! Sorry guys!) this month. I have had some crazy medical stuff come up meaning I have spent a lot of time at the doctors and a lot of time not feeling great. Thankfully that is all starting to shake out and I think I am feeling much better.
So...none of that has anything to do with my writing except...it is what kept me from it! That and a little thing I like to call my job! Ha ha. NaNoWriMo is not for sissies! My friend Karissa and I did this together and she struggled with it as well. She is a full time educator, a mother of 2, very active in her church etc. and she had trouble finding time to write EVERY single day as well. I think the program is incredible. I will be a part of it in any way I can in the future. I hope to get my library involved and see if we can host a write-in or something like that next year. I think it is really great to encourage writing. If you have interest in writing I learned a lot about it this month. One of the things I learned is that I personally cannot write a novel in a month! LOL
I also learned, though, that consistent writing is SO important! I wrote 26,000 words this month. I began this novel last November and had written 16,000 words before I began (so total I am at about 42k...almost but not quite...and not even close to done in terms of my story). The thing is I read both parts together and what I wrote this month is MUCH better. I don't think I suddenly became a better writer, I think it is because I was so focused on the story and writing so consistently. If you want to do it, you have to do it like that. Maybe not in a month, but I do think you have to sit down and do it instead of stretching it out like I had been doing before.
Also I learned, I am not a epic writer. I don't say that for pity. I think I am a decent writer but I don't write books like Lord of the Rings or Chronicles of Narnia. It isn't going to happen. My mind doesn't think that way and so I don't write that way. I write kind of sarcastic/funny...same way I think. I am learning (still a work in process) that is okay. It is my voice. It is what I have to share. I need to stop trying to be someone else and wanting to write their kind of story. I have my own and I need to own it. I am starting to.
So what is next for my story? Well I think a little bit of a break. I would like to push myself to finish it but in trying to be honest with myself and my needs right now, I cannot give it the time it needs. I have to move out this house by the end of this month. I finish this class this week. We have exams and end of the semester stuff at school, Christmas stuff is this month...it just isn't going to happen the way I want it to. I may not totally put it to rest in the sense of never writing if I get a chance or an idea, but I am not going to set a goal for myself for the rest of this year. Come January I want to get back into that consistent grove of writing that I was able to discover at the beginning of this month that I loved so much and see if I can't do something with this.
Writing this story has been exactly what I wanted it to be. It has been for me. It has been my creative outlet and my happy place all month. It has been a bit of a stress as well I admit, but I have loved it. I have loved rediscovering the writer in me. I will not forget her or neglect her. This month she will be a bit busy, but she will be thinking and plotting and ready to get to work again soon.
Thank you NaNoWriMo!! Thank you Karissa for pushing me a long. Thanks to all my friends and family who read all my boring status updates and so forth and offered support! You guys rock!
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